Saturday's Update

Just got back from the RE's office. Everything is still looking great, and I have a lot going on in my ovaries. My right ovary has one measurable follicle (9.7 mm) and five other follicles under 10 mm. My left ovary has three measurable follicles (11.2 mm, 10.7 mm, 9.5 mm) and 10 other follicles under 10 mm. My uterine lining (endometrium) is showing a triple layer, which is exactly what it should be doing at this point. The endometrium is measuring 6.6 mm as well. By the time of trigger / ER the endometrium should be anywhere from 8 - 16mm. The nurse called and noted that my E2 level (estrogen) is 307. This is an excellent number for this stage of the process. It needs to be above 800 by the time of the trigger injection (E2 levels should rise 50 - 100% every other day during stims). I have to return for monitoring on Monday morning at 8:30am. After Monday's appointment, I will probably have to go for monitoring EVERY day. Once things pick up, the RE needs to keep a close eye on me to make sure that I don't overstimulate, and so they can know when to best trigger ovulation. So - that will be all until Monday!

TGIF

Well, today is Friday. It is my fifth day of stim shots, and it is my eleventh day of lupron shots. By the end of the day today, I will have received a total of 16 shots. For fun, Matt and I might start playing connect the red dots on my belly. There are plenty of them to connect. I am extremely happy that Matt has returned home, as I have had to give myself five stinkin' shots. It is no fun to shoot yourself up, and I really wonder how anyone becomes an IV drug user. I am suffering from persistent headaches every day. This is a side effect of the lupron, I believe. I go to bed with a splitting headache, and I wake up with one, as well. I am only starting to get a little bit bloated. Yesterday was another day of monitoring at the RE's office. I had more bloodwork and another ultrasound done. I was told that it was just to measure how things were getting kicked off, and I am kicking things off quite nicely. So far, I have eight potential follicles growing in my right ovary and nine potential follicles growing in my left one. Not all are guaranteed to mature, and there is still a possibility that I could produce even more. However, seventeen is a great number with which to start. I will go back to the RE's office tomorrow morning (yes...I have to go in even on Saturdays) for yet more monitoring. Tomorrow's update will provide more insight on how well the follicles are growing. As of right now, it looks like egg retrieval could be as early as next Friday. It is still all just a guessing game at this time, though.

Stim Cocktail Hour

The baseline ultrasound and bloodwork went well today. My uterine lining was fine, and both ovaries were free of cysts. One ovary had five potential follicles waiting to be stimulated, and the other ovary had six. My primary nurse called me this afternoon to tell me that I should start taking my stim shots tonight. I will be having a "stim cocktail" every evening consisting of two vials of Gonal-F (150 IU) and one vial of Menopur (75 IU). They are pictured here with my sharps container which holds all of the discarded needles. This stim cocktail is given approximately twelve hours after the lupron shots in the morning. Tomorrow the lupron will be reduced to only 5 units (down from 20 units). I will continue on the same dosage of stims and lupron through Thursday when I return to the doctor's office for more monitoring (ultrasound and bloodwork). We accidentally nicked a vein this morning while administering the lupron shot. I now have a tiny blood blister on my belly. This evening's shot was a little bit better, but we still had a small bleeder. I am officially becoming a pin-cushion! Oh the joys of IVF!

One Step Closer...

Well, my cycle day one ended up arriving earlier than expected. Cycle day one was on Saturday, June 10th. It is required that I go to see the RE (reproductive endocrinologist) on cycle day 3 to have a "lupron evaluation". They will do a baseline ultrasound and bloodwork. This will let the doc know where my hormone levels are at this time and if my uterine lining looks as it should. If everything looks good, I will be instructed to start my stim shots (gonal-F and Menopur). These stim shots will be given in the evenings, and they will help stimulate my ovaries to produce multiple follicles (which will hopefully yield a good amount of viable eggs). So - tomorrow morning I will have the tests done, and I will more than likely begin the stim shots tomorrow night. Stay tuned!

Done with BCPs!

So - today is my last day on birth control pills (BCPs). Matt is in NYC, so I had to give myself the lupron shot in the belly this morning. The first stab was not hard enough, but I made sure the second one was. All in all, it wasn't too bad. Now that the pills are done, I have to wait for my next "cycle" to start. Once that happens I will be scheduled for a "lupron evaluation" to see where my hormone levels are at and what my uterine lining looks like. At that point they will let me know when to start stims. So - we are in a waiting pattern for a few days, but luckily enough I will still be getting a shot every day.

Let the Games Begin!

So - here we are, officially kicking off the IVF journey. Today was our first day of shots. At least for now, all we have to do is one shot of Lupron in the mornings. The process goes something like this:

• wash hands
• take cap off of lupron vial, and clean top of vial with an alcohol wipe
• take cap off of disposable needle
• pull back on plunger to draw 20 units of air into syringe
• push needle through top of lupron vial and inject the 20 units of air
• tip vial upside down, and draw plunger back to get 20 units of liquid
• tap on needle to get air bubbles to top, and prime needle if necessary to release air
• pinch a bit of skin under the bellybutton, but still near it, and wipe with alcohol
• jab needle all the way into the skin and inject all of liquid
• remove needle and place in Sharps container
• stare at each other in amazement that you actually have to do this

Doesn't it all sound very romantic? We like to cuddle afterwards...

Also, I started taking the baby / children's aspirin today. It is the chewable kind, and it tastes a bit like orange flavored rat poison. No wonder children don't like taking their medicine.

All of our IVF Meds

For those of you who are getting anxious to see / learn more about our IVF process, here is a photo for you. This is a picture of all of our IVF meds...pills, shots, etc.

First Shots Begin Tuesday, June 6

The first shots we will be doing are Lupron sub-q shots. We will do the shots each morning. This particular drug is used to keep me from ovulating, so the doctors can control the entire process. I will also begin taking baby aspirin the same day. The baby aspirin is used to improve blood flow. I will continue administering the lupron shots in the belly once a day up until the time of egg retrieval (ER).

The Whole Fam-damily....The In-Laws

Sprinkler and Smiley

Batman versus his nemesis...the Sprinkler! Also - he mentioned earlier that he can smile...well, here is the proof!

NATURE'S CHILD - a poem by Megan R.

NATURE'S CHILD

The wanton child tipped back her head

To suck the seeping sun

Golden drops of angels' flesh

Ripped through the chosen one

Drowning shadows on mountainsides

Danced to violent thunder hymns

Tripping down paled rays

Hexed by shrilling lightning screams

A rocky crest led to the shore

Swallowed by the light

Solar with lunar havens met

Spitting out the night

Halos wrapped around her head

Stretched taut with clinging bands

Harnessed winds disbanded ties

Cradling her with unseen hands

A hungry cave cut back its grin

Opening wide for its meal

Fate unwove, though shell of life,

The lone morsel stone could steal

Carefree soul now wanders earth

Bonding spirit with the land

Protected by her ancient caller

Separate now from man

Keeper of eternal growth

Meshed tight with flower sheath and tree

Her harboring body trapped forever

But her soul forever free

-Megan R.

One Day in Chi-Town...a past journal entry

The days are getting shorter. The heavy darkness of the summer nights is blanketing the sun earlier than I would like. The summer is slowly, but almost too quickly, fading away. Where does the time go? How is it that I have so lost myself in the vacuum of time that I can't even directly put my finger on to where it has slipped away? As much as I look forward to what each day and each moment will bring, I am saddened by what time has taken with its passing. But, we can't live in the past, so we must incorporate the delicious parts of it into our future. So - what do we take with us as we move on? How do we decide what is important? I guess it is all tied to feelings. That which is strongest will survive and will move on with us, hopefully growing and ever evolving. Some of the things that I would like to take with me are the fragments of relationships I've encountered - the minute bits and pieces of people who have touched me and filled up the tiny holes in my soul. I would like to take with me what it is to feel loved for exactly who I am - even if the brevity of that feeling is almost incalculable. I would like to take with me that larger than life feeling that has possesed me while in the city continuing on my path of self-exploration and self-realization. I would like to take with me the feeling of the warm sun hitting my face while it reflects off of the river below. I would like to take with me the feeling of the wind tangling itself violently into my hair without even caring what it has done to my appearance during its dance. I want to take with me all of those pure raw feelings that somehow hit me every day as I escape from the mundane pace of the rest of the world. I hope that my words can remind me of all of those intangible wonders that I have clumsily stumbled upon, yet that I have felt with an all-knowing conviction and want.
-Megan

Pre-Plunge

This is it. One of the last moments as semi-single people. The day after this we took the plunge and became Mr. and Mrs.

COLORADO

Matt and I LOVE Colorado. He went to college in Ft. Collins, and he stayed in Colorado for quite some time after graduating. I "lived" in Ft. Collins with friends the summer before starting college. I have been visiting Colorado with my family since I was just a little kid. If we could move to once place and live there forever...it would definitely be the mountain state. For right now, though, we will continue to travel there to ski, sight-see, hike, and whatever else we can do!

ps - in case you can't tell, Matt is the skier on the left...and I am the skier on the right!

The Girls

My two best friends are very different people, but both lovely in their own right. Kelly (on the left) and I went to college together. We both hated our sorority together, and spent most of our time at the bar. I must say that it did not affect my GPA in the least...it might have even helped! Kelly is married to Jason, they live in a suburb of Chicago, and they are expecting their first baby (a boy) in August. Canella (on the right) and I used to work together. I actually interviewed and hired her to replace me when I was promoted to a new position at an IT consulting firm. We hit it off from the start, and we are friends after both of us have moved on from that employer. Canella just received her associate's degree and will be continuing her education after she moves. She will be moving from Chicago to North Carolina toward the end of the year.

Please note: during this toast at my rehearsal dinner, I am toasting with a full pot of coffee. Why? Because it was there, and apparently I had misplaced my wine.

My Family

My parents, Bob and Judy, reside in a far west suburb of Chicago. They both were born and raised in northern Illinois. During the Vietnam war, my father was deployed to and stationed in Panama. My mom moved to Panama and worked in a hospital there in order to be with my dad when she could. Outside of that, Illinois has been their home. Both of my parents are retired from the insurance industry. They enjoy spending time playing in the river behind their home (fishing / canoeing / etc.). Their post-retirement routine includes taking as many road trips as possible all over the US. This summer they plan to take the motor home and head to Alaska. Their dog Eenie will be joining them on their adventure.I also have an older sister, Erin. She is married to Doug, and they have two sons. Benjamin is a little over 2 years old, and Paxon was born just this May.

The In-Laws

Jerry and Joanne are my in-laws. They still reside in a small town in Ohio. Jerry is a "retired" business owner who enjoys playing gin at the Elks Club. He is an active person who likes to work out regularly to maintain his health. In addition, he tries to travel to Colorado once a year to get in some time on the slopes. His favorite pastime is hosting tailgate parties at The Ohio State University football games. Joanne is a talented artist (water color) and an avid volunteer in her community. She has won the "volunteer of the year" award so many times that is now named after her and given out to other volunteers. Joanne's favorite pastime is trying to convince Jerry not to host OSU football game tailgate parties. Both are wonderful people to have as family.

In addition, Matt has two older siblings. His brother Scott and his family live in Ohio. Scott has two sons, Jameson and Mitchell. His sister Kim lives in Pennslyvania with her two daughters, Catherine and Maggie. Catherine is just finishing up her first year of college...nice job!...so she only lives at home part of the time.

BATMAN RETURNS

Hello, my name is Batman. I know...everyone says the same thing...I don't look like the real Batman. Please remember, though, that only the Batman costume was black, muscular, and shiny. Bruce Wayne was just a normal little white guy underneath...just like me.

I absolutely love my peeps. They take me for long walks in the park and for fun rides in the Jeep. My favorite games to play are frisbee, "hat", and football. Daddy doesn't let me play football much anymore, though, because I don't like to give the football back. Mean daddy... I also love to take drinks from the hose and to try to attack the sprinkler. Those things are crazy! I have a unique talent, which is that I can "smile" when my parents want me to. I really enjoy tearing all of the stuffing out of my toys and trying to find those cool little squeaky prizes on the inside. Who thought of such wonderful concepts for toys? When I am not out trying to save the world, I also enjoy taking naps (especially with my mommy).

My parents keep trying to tell me that I am a dog, but I still don't buy it. I am just a furry little person who happens to not be able to stand upright. I can't wait for my mommy and daddy to bring me a little brother or sister to play with. I am looking forward to the day that I will be able to clean up any baby food mishaps that find their way to the floor.

If you need any superhero assistance in the future, please do not hesitate to shine the bat symbol in the sky. I will find you...

- Batman

My Husband

I am thankful everyday for having such a wonderful person in my life. My husband, Matt, is my "favorite". He is bold, caring, ambitious, funny, loyal, and an all-around great guy. He was born and raised in a small town about an hour west of Columbus, OH. He graduated from Colorado State University in 1992. He has lived all over the US, and has traveled all over the world. He is a fantastic skier and holds Colorado dear to his heart. He is a huge sports fan, and his two favorite teams are the Dallas Cowboys and The Ohio State University Buckeyes. He has (for the most part) his dream job working for the North American headquarters for Porsche (PCNA). Who wouldn't enjoy getting to drive a race car as a perk?

Matt -

Thank you for continually speaking your mind and your heart - it melts me.
Thank you for loving me in a way that I have never experienced before and that I don't think I could ever experience with anyone else.
Thank you for being silly and for being serious.
Thank you for knowing exactly why I smile or giggle, even though I have not said a word.
Thank you for listening to me when I vent.
Thank you for laughing at me and poking fun at me when I pout or complain.
Thank you for having your eyes speak everything that my heart feels.
Thank you for just being in my life and for wanting me in yours.
I love you....

- Megan